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Cyber Bullying
May 15, 2008
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We all know that growing up can be painful sometimes and as if it wasn’t enough for kids to contend with loads of home-work, extra-curricular activities and even strict teachers, they also have to learn to tolerate vindictive peer pressure as well. Bullying is part and parcel of adolescent life but in this day and age, this practice is no longer confined to the proverbial play-ground or school locker room. Bullies have now ventured into cyber-space and this week, I go on-line to learn more about this disturbing trend and how society can curb this type of malicious behaviour.
You’re tuned in to Check Out on Radio Singapore International! I’m Michael Tan.
Reader’s Digest Asia recently an article exploring victimization and the consequences of cyber bullying. In one particular instance, 13-year-old Ryan Halligan from the United States committed suicide after being taunted for months by his class-mates. In another case, 15-year-old Gail Jones took her own life after receiving 20 silent phone calls on her mobile phone every 30 minutes. Of course, these are extreme examples of the effects bullying can have on people but that shouldn’t discount the fact that this type of behaviour is on the rise. Ms Siti Rohani is the Associate Editor of Reader’s Digest Asia and we had a conversation about what cyber bullying entails.
SR: Well, I think a lot of us are aware of what playground bullying is or just bullying behaviour or someone just you know, either calling you names or just taunting you and stuff like that but in cyber bullying, that just kind of takes it to a larger and wider audience because you know, just think of kids growing up in this kind of environment where they spend a lot of time on-line, they’re hooked up all the time, they check their e-mails, they do research on-line, they chat, they’re on FaceBook and things like that and all these are opportunities for people to reach you, for people to bully you so when it used to be that bullying would take place face to face, now we’re finding that bullying is taking place on all these digital levels where you know, people can forward ugly photos of you or set up a blog about how much they hate you and things like that so I mean, all of that constitutes cyber bullying, essentially, it’s just you know, bullying taken outside of the playground and on to the cyber world and that can encompass so many different things.
Like you said, cyber bullying is sort of similar to face to face bullying right?
SR: Mmm…
What are some of the characteristics of cyber bullying?
SR: Well, you know how bullying makes you feel. Okay, the victim, you know, how you feel victimized or how you feel taunted you know, I mean, that same kind of feeling that you get when someone tells you to your face, oh, you know, you look terrible or anything that makes you feel bad, anything that’s put out there in a malicious manner to purposely hurt you, I think that’s definitely bullying and cyber bullying, you know, talking about cyber bullying, it could mean so much more when someone sends un-truths about you and I think a lot of bullying is that, it’s definitely malicious, you know, I mean, someone who wants to do it definitely knows that this is going to cause you harm and this is going to hurt you a lot, so characteristically, bullying, whether it be on the playground or cyber bullying, I think the main characteristic is that it’s done in a malicious manner.
Okay, one of the things which I find very interesting though is the fact that people who exist on-line yeah, the stuff that they do on-line will never be the things that they do in real life…
SR: Oh yeah…
And they wouldn’t dare do this in real life so what do you think accounts for this?
SR: The people that we have spoken to, the experts that we have spoken to especially someone that we spoke to for the article, someone called Dr Marilyn Campbell, she said that most kids think that the cyber world is a place where adults don’t enter so they feel like they’re free to do this. Bullying behaviour is something you do when you think you’re not going to get caught. You don’t feel like you’re going to feel the repercussions of it, like no one’s going to know. And you know, the cyber world is a world with a lot of anonymity so I guess people hide behind that. These people could just not know that it’s actually quite easy to trace down who you are on-line but maybe they’re not aware of that and so they hide behind that cloak of anonymity and maybe they feel more empowered to do that.
The reason why cyber bullying is now on the rise is also because a lot of kids are entering the on-line world and bullying is intrinsically, sort of, a “kid thing”, meaning kids have a tendency to do that and now when kids are going on-line, no one’s policing their on-line surfing habits, so that’s when these things happen.
SR: Yup.
And Ryan Halligan, one of the case examples that you guys cited, he committed suicide. Are these extreme cases or is this sort of like a trend that we’re starting to see now?
SR: These are definitely extreme cases, however, it’s worrying that these cases even occur. I mean, I know we cited in our report that in Malaysia there were 60 cases that were reported and in Singapore there about 80. well, these might look like small numbers but you’ve got to remember that these are reported cases, so you know, for every reported case, who knows how many more there could be suffering alone or they don’t know who to turn to, you know? So whilst the cases where suicide happens and psychiatric care happens, those are just kind of the extreme, I think it’s still a very, very worrying trend that these things happen in the first place.
But see the thing is nay-sayers, they say that these kids who are so affected adversely just probably have a weak upbringing…
SR: Wow…
So what do you have in response to people who say, “You know, bullying is just a part and parcel of life and everyone should learn how to deal with that.”
SR: Well, I know what you mean when you say that it’s probably the person’s constitution or this person isn’t strong enough but I think that just means that you’re blaming that person, that the person can’t take the stress and therefore decided to end his or her life. I think in any sort of instance where you feel so pressured or you feel so hurt or you know, you feel like there’s no other way for you but to end your life, I think that’s sad! And I think the blame shouldn’t be on this person’s personality or how sensitive they are, I think that as a whole, people should be educated on how to stop cyber bullying, on how to spot it and also of course on how to deal with it so I think it’s important for kids to be aware that there’s a name to this thing that’s going on. I mean, if they get an e-mail from class-mates saying, oh you know, you’re ugly or something like that, then they need to know that there’s a name to that and they shouldn’t stand for these things and only when more people are aware or when you are aware that someone you know is doing that to someone else and then you can step up and say look, you know, you’re cyber bullying or that’s bullying behaviour and that’s not acceptable. Only when that happens, and it’s more widely recognized as a problem, only then can something be done about it.
Okay, so we’re going to go into all these avenues and how people can seek help in a little while. I understand that one of the things that people say is that the Internet does not just amplify the effects of bullying and John Carr, one of the persons that you interviewed said that the lack of face to face contact might tempt bullies to new levels of cruelty. Could you elaborate on that?
SR: Okay, when you bully someone face to face, I mean you can see the effect that you have on that person, you can realize and you can come to the conclusion that oh dear, this person is hurt by what I say or is harmed by what I say, but when you don’t see that person, there’s no sense of guilt to it, you don’t see what you’re causing, you don’t see the pain that you’re causing and therefore you’re removed from it. I think that sort of makes people unaware that they are causing problems and therefore they just carry on and do it.
Okay so now, in Singapore, especially in South-east Asia, the situation is also rampant right?
SR: In Singapore, 80 cases were reported to Wired Safety. Wired Safety is this on-line organisation, they deal a lot with cyber bullying and you can also go to their web-site, it’s wiredsafety.org, you can get a lot of advice there and all that and in terms of statistics, that’s about the only statistic that we can track down.
So Wired Safety, do people know about Wired Safety especially in Singapore, has there been enough awareness and publicity involving the existence of this organisation?
SR: I don’t think so, I mean, there hasn’t been enough spotlight on this problem and I think the more that people find out about it, you can go on-line and you can just Google it, “cyber bullying”. There’re a lot of previous cases that we mentioned. You know that leads me to think sometimes, a lot of people, they get on YouTube, they get forwarded all these things, all these funny things and you know, people singing off-key or you know, people doing funny things and making you laugh and we all do that, we all forward it around and we have a laugh but I think we just need to just imagine if that person was you and half the world is laughing at you. I think that’s devastating and that’s the scale that we’re talking about here that playground bullying doesn’t have, which is, you get taunted in school, only someone in school will know about it, but you know, you get taunted on-line, there’s a chance that everyone in the world, everyone who’s connected on-line can have a look at your video and laugh at you and I think that’s a massive scale and that’s very, very scary.
And I think the difference is that these people probably didn’t intend for their footage or something to be circulated…
SR: Exactly.
As opposed to the YouTube sort of…
SR: Yeah, and it’s worse if someone finds it or you know, you forward it on to a friend and you just go, haha, you know, look at what I did which is funny and that friend forwards it on for everyone to have a laugh and then before you know it, it’s viral and everyone’s looking and laughing.
Mmm, and I think cyber bullying by the way, is not just applicable to kids.
SR: Definitely.
I think adults have also been victimized on-line.
SR: Edison Chen and his…
Yeah…
SR: Yeah, haha… that exploit…
Haha, okay, that’s a completely different, 360 degree sort of thing, but what are some of the symptoms that experts have identified in regard to a person who is being bullied on-line constantly or…
SR: Okay, if you think that your child is being bullied, your child may display little symptoms like they might seem upset or angry, especially after they’ve just gone off-line or they’ve just used their phone. They will start to withdraw from other friends or even activities that they used to love. They just don’t want to do that anymore. Their grades may be suffering especially in classes that they used to really do well in and you see that they’re just not doing well anymore. These could all be pointing to the fact that there may be a problem and of course the onus is on the parent to start the child talking. I think what’s more important is making the issue out there, just putting the issue out there and making everyone understand and aware of the problem and talking to your children, making sure they’re not being victimized or bullied. And of course on the flip-side, making sure that your kids are not the ones doing the bullying. I think it’s also important to make sure that your child realizes what constitutes bullying behaviour and what they should not do on the Internet or to their friends.
And that was Ms Siti Rohani, Associate Editor of Reader’s Digest Asia. Log on to www.wiredsafety.org to learn how you can tap into legal avenues to police errant behaviour on the Internet.
This has been Check Out for Radio Singapore International!
This is Mike signing off for now, ‘til next week, be good and be safe! Take care!
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